For a man I never met, I never would have thought a person could have such an affect on my life by his death. A tragic reminder how life with the one I love is so precious. No man could ever take Dwayne's place. If anything was to ever happen I'd be that woman that never removed his clothes from the closet and would spend endless hours looking at his pictures. For me, Dwayne is my once in lifetime love of my life. Now, with the recent death of his coworker I find myself clinging even tighter almost obsessively to the man I find so endearing. I now realize no matter how quick, fast and smart he is, it doesn't matter if you are dealing with a crazy person. Defensive tactics never presume over offense. Cops are not taught to shoot first and ask questions later. Unfortunately for Deputy Coleman all the quickness, strength or brains in the world could not have prevented his untimely death. It is unfair.
It is so unfair to his wife and children. It makes me both sad and angry at the same time. Mostly I think about how it would feel to be his wife eating dinner at the table with her children now. How there would be an empty seat and how it may be so quiet and she may not be able to swallow her food as tears well up in her eyes. How for 20 years she may have cooked enough food for 4 and now she must relearn to cook in portions for 3. I think about how big her bed may feel and wonder when she wakes in the middle of the night if she forgets he is no longer alive and rolls over to hold him only to find a lumpy pillow.
Deputy Coleman was a man my husband admired and respected. I could see today he has touched the lives of many and was good spouse, deputy, friend and father. I am sorry I never met him.
I didn't think much about death of my husband before now. Now I can't stop thinking about it.
